A few months back, I was in the midst of a deep dive into the large library of goop podcasts when I was intrigued by one title in particular: “How to Become Your Future Self.” Over the next 80 miles and 50 minutes, I listened as the worlds of holistic healing and quantum physics collidedContinue reading “I tried Dr. Joe Dispenza meditations for 7 days”
Category Archives: writings
Looking back at 21
Thrashing against the repetition: rocks against waves against rocks I was thrown out of this wet possibility, hurled onto a solid surface eating sand over and over
In Meeting Myself
I discover raspberries blooming under my fingernails and my hair turns to drops of honey when it falls onto my pillow my skin sings sweetly when strummed, my teeth pull on pink I love looking in the mirror with mascara and the fourth outfit I tried I love seeing myself as a beautiful woman ByContinue reading “In Meeting Myself”
The first apology of the day
Like a snake, I am shedding the flaky layer of my estranged past. It has hard to keep things straight- when people press into my pain, and say they relate to my work. I forget what grievances I am still paying off and I crawl on my belly as penance to theContinue reading “The first apology of the day”
Crumbs
Must I spend my whole life begging for the crumbs of your affection? I follow you trying to remain quiet and unnoticed, a person who has become nothing is difficult to grab with the snares of hatred. My plate is never full, even when I pile the scraps in the center- Continue reading “Crumbs”
A Trip Like No Other
The year is sometime in the distant past and our setting is a quiet suburban town. The crime rates are low and the resident satisfaction is high. All the children know each other and families sleep with their doors unlocked. If you come at just the right time, you will likely see a few piesContinue reading “A Trip Like No Other”
The Space Between
your lips on the soles on of my feet the dissolving of a border a boundary a degree of separation removed we danced until sunrise the soft carpet unfurling to catch our toes velvet dresses licked knees your pants hugged your thighs you scrambled eggs the smell made me throw up i haveContinue reading “The Space Between”
A widening gap
Bandaids and stitches and chewed wads of bubble gum but nothing was enough to pull together the gap that stretched between us. I remember the first time I knew it wouldn’t last, and my aggressive optimism immediately following. I believed that if I loved you enough, hung onto every word as if itContinue reading “A widening gap”
The highest price
people brush past me and bump into me everyone in a rush everyone in a hurry all these people with their own stories even if i spent my entire lifetime, it’s not possible to know them all so we capture the ones we can we hold them in our soft palms we promiseContinue reading “The highest price”
The Heaviest Gallon
As I sit in my half-packed bedroom smoke leaks out my mouth as the warm liquid pushes its way inside. My first drink in four years and my first smoke in double that. “Doris, what’s the big deal? I want to get fat free milk.” This was the moment where everything collided and forContinue reading “The Heaviest Gallon”